Saturday, June 14, 2008

Twins Rock?

The twins' shirts (see photo) make me laugh. I was actually the one to buy them, and I bought them because I thought "I really don't think 'twins rock' so I'll torture myself with these shirts". It's my own strange sense of humor directed back at myself. Yes, I'm a bit odd.

I am definitely not in the 'oh, multiples are amazing!' category. It's tough work folks. It's exhausting and frustrating (especially with the third element thrown in there ... the preschooler). And I feel a little guilt in saying this, because I know there are millions of women struggling with infertility who would give anything to have a set of twins. I am even lucky to count two of these women as good friends - one here in town with me, and one in Australia. My childhood friend/neighbor/colleague has the set of 5-year-old girl twins (whose birthday party I discussed here not long ago) and my Australian friend has a set of 1-year-old boy twins. Both of these friends struggled with fertility and have a different perspective on their multiples. I know they'd agree that multiples can be a challenge, but I think they might feel just a bit more blessed than I do. I haven't felt the "blessing" yet. I'm still shell shocked this is happening to me.

Ahhhh, it's the weekend. Weekends are a different ballgame entirely. I usually have the husband's help (he's the reason I can sleep in on the weekends, or leave on errands by myself), but while his help can be great, it's a whole different rhythm from the week days. We go five days of the week without much help from him during the day, and we get used to our patterns and schedules, and then the husband reinserts himself on the weekends and everything changes. The household gets instantly louder and Claire is one hyper kid around him. Daddy is FUN! Daddy plays fun crazy games! Let's scream! Let's laugh as loud as we can! I'm usually left to cower in the corner with a sleepy baby and yell at Kyle and Claire to quiet down.

I think I'm a drill-sergeant kind of mom with these three kids, keeping everyone in order, watching the "schedule" like a hawk, being the tough discipliner. Sometimes I hate barking orders all day long, but mostly it gives me some semblance of control of which I feel I have very little at the moment. Kyle is the polar opposite of that. He's the Disneyland Daddy type. He doesn't know what a schedule is. And he, like my 3-year-old, is a class-act dawdler. It's my biggest frustration on the weekends. When I'm with the kids by myself, I can get us out the door and to lunch in a matter of minutes. If Kyle's with us, it's a minimum of a half an hour exercise to get out the door. It's maddening to me. Can you guess what the weekend arguments revolve around?

Nevertheless, Drill Sergeant Mom and Disneyland Dad ended up pulling together a decent day for the kids this Saturday. I slept in (though not much - kids were too loud) and Kyle had the kids for a while this morning. We got the kids out to lunch and were back for baby naptime. I did a quick Target run during naptime and Kyle and Claire played. When I got back, we packed up the family and went back to the art fair at the outdoor mall. We walked around looking at the booths and did some shopping at Macy's too. Lily didn't manage herself very well - she was getting tired and she doesn't like to sit still in the stroller - but overall it was a good outing. Dinner was a breeze with a crockpot meal and now all three kids are in bed.

And I must go do something about Father's Day! Whoops. I forgot about that day tomorrow and all those signs at Macy's alerted me to my oversight. So I must sneak off and go get a card or two. I suppose it's the least we can do for Disneyland Dad.

No comments: